Tuesday, December 05, 2006
A simple tune i only write variations to.
If only i'd use the dictionary as normally as everyone else, then probably i'd be understood. It's this obstinate nature, to have full power over the way sentences are being constructed to convey meanings which can't otherwise be fully grasped, like the way i want my Lego blocks to fit together to form a complex tower, that causes everyone to leave me to my own world. Not that it's particularly upsetting (see this huge grin), but i wish the world doesn't give up on me too soon, too easily.
Having lost the ability to stand upright and look at the world in the eye, having lost my tongue to the cat, having lost the idea of the reason of my existence within existence, having my compass confiscated, having lost the will to fight, i sought and thus found solace in the mere existence of this writing space. However, the more i write, the more i've forgotten the skill of speaking and thus i've become less articulate and greatly misunderstood. And once more, i stand alone as the world come to a standstill - my bad.
And when it's gotten so bad (so bad as in lacrimal glands in hyperactivity), i'll drown everything in music. And at the same time, silently whine to God, hoping He wouldn't be too irritated to listen to me. But He is amazing, able to listen to three billion people whining everyday without having to throw rabbits against the wall out of frustration. The remaining billions do the proper thing - perform prayers, and thus the rabbits are spared. The only time He'll turn his back on me is when i turn mine on Him. Even then, he'll send rabbits to me in case i need to vent pent-up frustration, and still keep an eye on me.
For now, there're only five things i wish i could be doing:
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fara // 01:23
A simple tune i only write variations to.
If only i'd use the dictionary as normally as everyone else, then probably i'd be understood. It's this obstinate nature, to have full power over the way sentences are being constructed to convey meanings which can't otherwise be fully grasped, like the way i want my Lego blocks to fit together to form a complex tower, that causes everyone to leave me to my own world. Not that it's particularly upsetting (see this huge grin), but i wish the world doesn't give up on me too soon, too easily.
Having lost the ability to stand upright and look at the world in the eye, having lost my tongue to the cat, having lost the idea of the reason of my existence within existence, having my compass confiscated, having lost the will to fight, i sought and thus found solace in the mere existence of this writing space. However, the more i write, the more i've forgotten the skill of speaking and thus i've become less articulate and greatly misunderstood. And once more, i stand alone as the world come to a standstill - my bad.
And when it's gotten so bad (so bad as in lacrimal glands in hyperactivity), i'll drown everything in music. And at the same time, silently whine to God, hoping He wouldn't be too irritated to listen to me. But He is amazing, able to listen to three billion people whining everyday without having to throw rabbits against the wall out of frustration. The remaining billions do the proper thing - perform prayers, and thus the rabbits are spared. The only time He'll turn his back on me is when i turn mine on Him. Even then, he'll send rabbits to me in case i need to vent pent-up frustration, and still keep an eye on me.
For now, there're only five things i wish i could be doing:
- Shave my head
- Write my fleeting thoughts into songs and busk alone at the Fountain Court of China Square Central at night when the stars are out and the lights are dimmed
- Partake in a conversation with a psychic partner, master of silent language
- Bite off my excess flesh so i can fit into more tiny secret hiding places
- Sleep
Well uh, let's start with Number Five.
fara // 01:23
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♥ Fara. Forever20. Nurse. In the pursuit of kidnapping Happy.
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